Waiting to Regret
by Annjirika
Summary: [one-shot] Kairi's feeling guilty about a certain silver-haired friend of hers. Semi-shocking moment.


_A/N: This is pretty random and it's an experiment with less description and more dialogue. I don't expect much with this fic since it's … odd and not exactly my best writing. More of a 'Bored-out-of-my-mind-during-psychology' sort of thing. Not a Riku/Kairi, btw._

_Let's pretend Riku and Sora are back on the island and this is after Kingdom Hearts takes place. _

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_Waiting to Regret_

_Annjirika_

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_My heart flows _

_  
In a mirror where the moon spreads_

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Tears I can't conceal fall _

_  
While the stars tremble_

_**Suteki da ne**_

_z-z-z-z-z-z_

Lightning shot across the black sky, weaving through the clouds. Thunder followed seconds later, rumbling above the skyscrapers. The roads were dark and slick, shining with rain in the orange light of the street lamps. Cars drove past, splashing dirty water onto the sidewalks. The air smelled of rain and pollution. This was life in the city.

Two friends walked along the edge of the streets, talking idly. One had long silver hair that was pulled back in a low, simple ponytail. He wore a long black coat with a hood to keep from getting wet. His name was Riku.

The other was a young redheaded woman with big blue eyes and a pretty smile. She twirled a small umbrella at her side, waiting for the rain to start again. Her name was Kairi.

"One day, I'd like to see the ocean. Just for a minute even." Kairi was saying, her eyes sparkling.

"I wouldn't mind seeing an ocean but I'd much rather do something more…I don't know. Climb a mountain, go skiing…plow a field." Riku grinned.

"Plow a field?" Kairi giggled. "Why that?"

"It's different, right? I want to do it all. See it all. I wanna really live get out of this…this concrete prison."

"'_I wanna see it all.'_" Kairi repeated. "That sounded so much like Sora."

Riku made a face. "It did, didn't it? Okay, forget I said that then."

"You meanie!" Kairi picked up on the dig at their friend. Riku laughed. "You're just jealous cause Sora's got me." She teased.

Riku's eyes flashed. His smile widened. "Ah, you are correct. If only…" He sighed, falling against her dramatically.

She giggled again. "Get off me." She pretended to be disgusted as she pushed him away.

Riku slowly grew more serious,drawing out a long silence. Kairi found herself wondering if there was more to his teasing than he let on. Riku wondered if Kairi had picked up on his feelings. This wasn't the first time they'd wondered these things.

"Is everything okay?" Kairi asked lightly. She was used to Riku's seriousness just as she knew his sillyness. It still didn't stop her from worrying about it.

"Yeah, it's great. Why?"

"You just…got quiet."

"Sorry, started thinking."

"What about?" Kairi pressed.

Riku glanced at her. He could tell she wasn't trying to pry…she was genuinely interested in what he had to say. That was another thing he loved about her. "Ah, nothing important." He shrugged, his eyes seeming to glow against the dark of the night and the dark of his hood. After another few silent seconds he added, "Did you ever consider…me?"

"Consider you what?"

"As more than a friend?"

Kairi recognized his meaning and blushed. "Oh…" She said quietly. The question had caught her off guard. "Riku…I don't know how to answer that."

"Try it honestly." He suggested, then cringed. "No wait, never mind. I shouldn't have asked. Forget it." He crossed his arms over his chest and looked out at the street.

"No, I feel like this conversation has been a long time coming."

"We don't need to talk about it-"

"We do! We can't keep avoiding it. I know how you felt about me-"

"Feel. How I feel about you."

"Okay, well still…" Kairi seemed to embarrass herself.

"Fact of the matter is, no matter how much I wish I could be with you, you're Sora's. You two are meant for each other, even back then." He still wouldn't look at her. "So now, we've talked. It never has to be mentioned again."

Kairi sighed. "But…" She trailed off, at a loss for words. He was right. She knew she could never love him as more than her best friend. Her heart belonged to Sora, even though it was breaking at the moment. She impulsively dropped her umbrella and wrapped her arms around Riku's neck to hug him. "We may not be in love, ya know, but you're still my best friend." She told him seriously.

He chuckled, returning the hug. "Yeah, okay." As they began to pull apart, Riku unexpectedly leaned forward and surprised her with a kiss. At first Kairi didn't recognize what was happening. Then she shoved him away.

"Riku!" She cried, her voice both shocked and angry.

He stumbled back into the street, his eyes wide. "I-I'm sorry…I-"

The car came out of nowhere.

The last thing Kairi remembered was the flash of headlights, the blaring of a horn, and watching as Riku's body crumbled to the ground…

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Kairi woke with a jolt; her breathing was labored and she was aware of tears on her face. At first glance it seemed to still be dark outside, like the moments before the pink of the sun begins to fill the sky. It was cloudy, dull, and rainy.

The dream lingered in her mind, the remembrance of the blood speeding up her heart. The dream was new to her but the theme was not. Her therapist had explained the plaguing nightmares as repressed guilt. Kairi knew why she was feeling guilty. How could she not? Her best friend _had_ gone to the darkside for her sake. Sure, he had said that he'd do it again in a heartbeat and there were no hard feelings but somehow…

Kairi dried her face with her shirt and cleared her throat, leaning over to her little wooden nightstand. She pulled the phone off the hook and dialed the number she'd known by heart seemingly forever. It ran a few times until a click on the other end told her he'd picked up.

She felt silly to be so relieved to hear his voice, still rough with sleep. "What?" He griped, only half-awake.

She smiled into the phone, feeling much better.

"Hi, Riku."

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_A/N: Hmm. Shorter than I'd initially meant for it to be. Oh well…_


End file.
